Tuesday, October 2, 2018

My Muse... that Fucking Bitch...

My muse is typically pretty amazing, feeding me all kinds of stories, all the time... often too many for me to digest (you should see my "unwritten" file.)

I see my stories like movies in my mind, scene by scene, and that's how I write them -- as I saw them playing out.

Right now, I have three Kelex stories on deck...

One is something that hit me hard and I *thought* really wanted to be told. I completely see the first few chapters of the book--hell, I've already written two of them-- but then after that, I only see pieces. I tried to force an outline and drag those scenes together, but I can't find the thread.

So... maybe it's not completely ready yet. It's a hugely important book and I want to do it right, because it deserves to be done right.

The second is a story I promised a while ago *cough* Midnight 5 *cough*

Again, I see the beginning and some pieces in the middle, but I can't see the whole thing in my mind. I think I know the players involved, but the story is just alluding me. I've seen this beginning for MONTHS now and can't seem to fill in the blanks... so I went off on some tangents, finished off the In Bed series, tried a new pen name, all of that basically wasting time until I could figure this one out.

It. Won't. Come.

*head-desk*

The third was one I was sitting on. I can see the whole story in my mind, but in all honesty, I think it's such a GINORMOUS story that I don't know how I can contain it.

And truth be told, it started out as a VERY different story. About 60,000 words in and I realized the secondary storyline was in all actuality the real story and that I needed to surgically remove it from the other words and make the secondary characters the stars.  It left me with 40,000 words for book one and potentially 20,000 for book two.

After surgery in June, I wanted to let it sit, heal, and let my brain get away from it before diving back in, all fresh and shit.

Now, I'm standing on the edge of the deep end, scared shitless.

This story is something very different for me. I am IN LOVE with this story... so in love with it, I'm terrified you all will hate it.

Yes, it is gay romance. Yes, it has erotic bits that will keep it steamy. Yes, people will possibly love it as much as I do, but... it's more romancey than I typically write AND has some very, very difficult and dark events within that I'm just not sure the characters can truly survive. Heck, I might not survive writing it. Parts of the outline have got me teary eyed.

So, I'm diving in.

If you don't hear a whole lot out of me for a bit, don't worry. I don't think I'll drown.

Hopefully.




Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...